One of the most commonly discussed topics in the manosphere is the problem of false sexual assault accusations. While this was always a pertinent topic for promiscuous characters like players and PUAs it has take on more significance in the post MeToo era. Especially because of the absolutely terrible advice young men are being given by woke leftists on how to “appropriately” address accusations against them. As if social propriety should be at the forefront of a man’s mind during a crisis rather than defending himself and his reputation.
I’ll begin with a brief discussion on how the issue tends to play out in the celebrity world and tie that into the lessons the average Joe can take away when finding himself in a similar predicament. While the MeToo era has has provided countless incidents of bullshit accusations being thrown at male celebrities I’ll use the incidents involving Aziz Ansari and Neil Degrasse Tyson as examples.
Let’s start with Neil. He was accused by two different women of literally nothing more than an awkward handshake and a clumsy social interaction. A third woman accused him of rape. Neil responded to these allegations by writing a lengthy blog post on his facebook page that began with paying homage to the MeToo movement and then dissecting the two awkward interactions in depth and issuing an apology for any unintended offence. He did the same with the rape allegation. These flimsy accusations ended up being recycled in articles on the pages of prominent newspapers and magazines for weeks on end.
Aziz Ansari on the other hand faced just one accusation and that was nothing more than him getting physical at a faster pace than the girl was comfortable with. The woman herself admitted she consented to being intimate with him but didn’t like how “non smooth” his moves were. The date ended with Aziz getting her a taxi home. This otherwise unremarkable and banal social interaction resulted in a viral blog post and ensuing gossip all over social media. Aziz’s response was more or less the same as Neil’s involving paying tribute to the MeToo hashtag and apologizing to the woman who had not even been wronged.
The point of this post is not to debate the particulars of the interactions themselves, you can read the mainstream media rags for that gossip but to discuss the responses of the men. Why is it that both of these men felt compelled to pay homage to a trendy feminist hashtag before defending their public reputations from irreparable damage ?
It is because of a cultural bias coined by writer Rollo Tomassi as the “Feminine Imperative ”. I recommend reading his books for a detailed explanation but I’ll summarize it by saying it is in essence a feminist cultural bias that encourages society to always prioritize the needs and desires of women as a group over the needs and desires of men. In these cases that refers to feminists prioritizing women’s desire to “punish” men who made them feel uncomfortable over men’s ability to defend their innocence.
It is important that men recognize that this bias exists so they can undo that cultural programming and respond in a manner that prioritizes *their own* wellbeing. The way men who are public figures should respond to these accusations is to dismiss them offhand as petty gossip and call the woman out on her bluff. Sexual harassment and sexual assault are already crimes in every country on the planet. If a woman is willing to talk about her sexual assault with every media outlet in the country but doesn’t file a police report there’s a good reason for it. Namely the legal penalties for filing a false police report.
If Aziz, Neil and every other male public figure that was falsely accused just challenged the women to prove their accusations in court the gossip would die fairly quickly when the women failed to follow through. Thats not much different than a guy talking a big game about how he’s the most skilled fighter in town and then refusing to step into the ring when challenged.
To further drive the point home I’d recommend asking yourself why rockstars and rappers have miraculously avoided becoming a target of the MeToo mania when they clearly have far more sexual indiscretions than any other group of men. Sure, part of the reason is that they are high SMV* males and misconduct accusations are generally targeted at low SMV males who tried to fuck out of their league. But its also due to the fact that they are men who don’t give a fuck about social propriety and won’t hesitate to call people out on their bullshit when attacked.
Now what does this all mean for the average Joe ? Not all that much since you’re likely not significant enough for the media to come after you. Regular guys should focus on reducing the risk of being accused in the first place and knowing how to manage the legal risks if they do end up being accused.
The most important risk management technique is one that you’ll never hear from the MRAs** who often discuss false rape accusations.
Learn pickup and game !
As evident by the situation with Aziz Ansari, a lack of calibration is often what lands a lot of guys in hot water. If Aziz had read Tom Torero’s books he would know how to gradually escalate and when to back off thus avoiding the image of the “overly pushy” creepy guy. If regular guys learn to calibrate their behaviours more they can significantly reduce their chances of being MeToo’ed unless of course they are dealing with a completely batshit crazy chick.
Which brings me to my last point. Legal defence. I recommend that all guys save screenshots of texts with girls they date and back them up onto some USB or external hard drive because if you do need to hire a lawyer you want to make his job as easy as possible. The moment you become aware that a girl has accused you of misconduct whether through word of mouth or a social media post NEVER reach out to her to apologize or “clear the air ”. You’ll only dig yourself into a deeper hole. Keep your mouth shut and speak to a lawyer. If she smeared you on the internet sue her for defamation as well.
To conclude, if you’re a guy with a good head on his shoulders you don’t need to be paranoid about being falsely accused. Just be prepared, chill out and have fun.
- Sexual Market Value
** Men’s Rights Activists